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Movies of 2017 - An Early Look

July 21, 2016 -

This is generally the kind of post I do in November, but I felt like taking an early look. What I found was a list of mostly remakes and sequels. It's really kind of sad. This list will likely change before the end of the year, but for now, here's what we've got.

  • Spider-Man: Homecoming - Potentially the first good Spider-Man movie. Okay - the second Toby McGuire was was okay, but this is likely to be a lot better. Apparently, the film will be drawing inspiration from the films of John Hughes. They're apparently casting Michale Keaton as one of Spider-Man's rogues who hasn't previously appeared in a film. Who could it be? The Vulture? Mysterio? Kraven the Hunter?
  • Star Wars, Episode VIII - If they're mirroring the original trilogy, this one is their Empire. It needs to be good. I'm hopeful.
  • Guardians of the Galaxy 2 - I know I just got finished complaining about sequels, but I'm completely down for more Drax. And Star Lord too.
  • Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets - I know pretty much nothing about this film. It could be another Jupiter Rising, or it might be good.
  • Ghost in the Shell - With Scarlett Johannson. It's not the Akira film everyone's been waiting for, but it might be worth watching.
  • Untitled Blade Runner Sequel - Seriously? Wow. Okay - I'll try.
  • God Particle - A J.J. Abrams film. Looks interesting. Astronauts conduct an experiment and then the Earth disappears.
  • The Dark Tower - I never read the books, but I know a lot of people who love them.
  • Alien: Covenant - Prometheus was kind of a train wreck, I know. Is it bad that I'm hoping this one is better?
  • Uncharted - Based on the game. I'm not expecting much.
  • Wonder Woman - It's a DC film. Not even sure I'll rent it.
  • Justice League - Ditto - it's DC's Avengers. Meh.
  • Untitled Wolverine Movie - I rented Wolverine 17, or whatever the last one was. It wasn't great.

So that's a list of what to me are the notable films, both apparently good and expectedly bad. But there are also a ton of reboots and sequels. Apparently someone noticed that people were making money from remakes of 80s films. Check this out.

  • Jumanji - Apparently, "Internet reception to this announcement was negative, with some (internet forum) posters remarking that this announcement came too soon after the death of Williams." - personally, I think the film franchise can survive without Robin Williams, I'm just not sure the story needs to be retold.
  • The Six Billion Dollar Man - Played by Hugh Jackman. In itself, not notable. What is notable? Apparently, it's a musical.
  • It - The Steven King book. Not sure anyone can do as good a job as Tim Curry did with Pennywise.
  • Flatliners - Aside from the 80s-ness of it, I never really loved the original.
  • Friday the 13th - Again?
  • CHIPs - It can only ever be good if they go the route they did with the Starsky & Hutch comedy remake.
  • Baywatch - Seriously?

And then there are the remakes.

  • World War Z 2
  • Cars 3
  • Kingsman: The Golden Circle
  • Transformers: The Last Knight
  • Despicable Me 3
  • War for the Planet of the Apes
  • Amityville: The Awakening
  • Paddington 2
  • The Croods 2
  • Pitch Perfect 3
  • Insidious: Chapter 4
  • Underworld: Blood Wars
  • xXx: The Return of Xander Cage
  • Saw: Legacy
  • Resident Evil: The Final Chapter
  • T2: Trainspotting 2
  • Fifty Shades Darker
  • John Wick: Chapter 2
  • Kong: Skull Island
  • Smurfs: The Lost Village
  • Fast 8
  • The Nut Job 2
  • Pirates of the Carribean: Dead Men Tell No Tales
  • Bad Boys 3
  • The Equalizer 2

Nearly all of these are completely unnecessary. I'd rather have original movies flop than have to live in a world where World War Z 2, Trainspotting 2 and another Transformers movie exist. The first World War Z movie stole the name of an amazing book and slapped it on an unrelated zombie film. It was almost as bad as another Transformers movie murdering my childhood.

Comments on Movies of 2017 - An Early Look
 
Comment Thu, September 1 - 1:15 PM by Greg
How did I miss Thor: Ragnarok? We get three Marvel movies in 2017!